Helen –09/03/10

 Helen 09/02/10

 Now we sit here and wait…  so far there is very little wind but the sky is ominously gray.  We have been told to expect a storm surge of 3 to 5 feet of water and wind up to 70 miles per hour.  Bryce has lines to pilings and the dock that can be adjusted from the boat for rising water levels.  We have done all the preparations that can be made.  Now we will see what kind of punch Earl wants to give us.

 Helen 09/02/2010

Both of us have an explorer streak—we like to find new places.  Today we explored the little creeks that branch out from the Oriental harbor.  There were some lovely houses with docks behind where boats of various types were tied up.  We saw lots of floats marking crab pots and a few people fishing for puppy drum in remote coves.  I always want to see where a creek ends or disappears (or becomes too narrow or shallow for anything but a kayak).  Our curiosity quenched, we turned the dinghy around and entered the main harbor where the shrimp boats are docked.  We noticed that not as many boats were in the harbor as in previous weekends—maybe the shrimping season is winding down.  We tied up the dinghy at the public dock and walked across the street to the Bean for my favorite drink, a “Bean Freeze”.  The Bean is the heart of the town and everyone eventually goes there sometime in the weekend.  We met a friend we had not seen for many months and chatted for an hour while catching up on the local news.  Such a treat!  Yes, a girl needs to have some fun—and the dinghy ride was just what I needed.

 Helen—08/28/10

Bryce and I enjoy these cruises but we work hard too.  I admire Bryce’s wisdom about where to delve each day and how to tailor exercises to meet each couple’s needs.  I know that it must take a lot of courage and energy for each odyssey couple to trust us and give every bit of effort to improve the relationship.  We are always tired at the end of each day and I cannot imagine how tired our couples must be.  Not only do we move the boat from one location to another almost every day, but we also move the relationship forward each day.  There is so much new material to digest daily.  

 As I sit here now and look back at the past three Safe Passage cruises that we have completed so far this summer, I want to say “Thank you” to the couples who have been brave enough to trust us and let us “beta test” the Love Odyssey concept.  It seems that it really does work.  And now I look forward to all the new adventures on the relationship sea for couples who need an odyssey to get their relationship back on course again.

 Helen –08/21/10

 Helen –08/15/10

 Helen – 08/08/10

Yes, it was hot yesterday–but the breeze was what saved us–and also lots of bottles of cold water to drink. In three hours we were at the Neuse River Marker, half-way to Ocrocoke. Bryce does not like to tack, so the ride back to Oriental was with sails furled and motor going full-tilt. We lounged on the bow and got sufficiently wet with spray to make the heat bearable. An hour later we were tied up in our slip and ready for a dip in the marina’s pool. Not a bad day on the water!
Helen– 07/25/10

 There was a lot of teaching, a lot of story-telling, some tears and a whole lot of laughter.  I think that the laughter was especially important in framing the voyage as a safe place to explore.  Even so, the process was emotionally intense.  By Wednesday we all agreed that we needed a break to NOT focus on the relationship and to just relax and take in New Bern.  I think the zenith of the trip was when we arranged an old resentment burial service out on a remote beach at sunrise.  We ferried the couple there at 6 AM when the sun was just rising and the beach was deserted.  Each person had a full half-hour to read and vent their list of past resentments with their partner listening with no retort.  After each had their turn, they burned their lists together in a little grave they had dug for their cremation ceremony.  After they filled in the resentment grave,  I officiated as captain and guided them through their pledges to each other.  Then out came the champagne, toasts and hugs all around.  While the whole ceremony was going on, I felt so blessed to be able to have these kinds of experiences that so many people aren’t able to have.  It was a somewhat transcendent feeling of being so close to the pulse of life.  These people were sharing their core truths in the most heroic way imaginable.

 Another take-away from this trip was to again see Helen’s innate brilliance when she combines her wisdom with her awesome emotional warmth.  I remember sitting there watching her as the couple talked with us.  But I had to laugh out loud at how much she out-matched me in making a connection with them.  They were looking at her the majority of the time and for good reason.  There she was, nodding her head and giving little verbal reassurances that she was tracking and understanding it all.  Her attunement skills are out of this world!  I sit and listen with interest and wonder.  But she listens and exudes warmth and compassion.  I may have more understanding of how things fit together and how people need to grow.  She’s able to model how to be emotionally whole.  She and I have different strengths and it’s good for my “Inner Ceasar” to be humbled by some of hers.

 Bryce – 7/18/2010

 I have also seen significant changes in the individuals on our odyssey.  Initially they are hurting and angry and over the course of the week they begin to see their own maladaptive behaviors and the part they played in marital problems.  Then there is a re-awakening as they learn better ways to communicate with their partner.  And today I see their hope in turning the relationship around and making it into something strong and loving.  WOW! How neat!  I can’t wait to do another odyssey! 

 Helen – 07/17/10