Love Odyssey

I love boats–any kind of boat, big, small, monohull, catamaran, trimaran, kayak, canoe, rowboat, it doesn’t matter. I guess I am just enamored by the whole idea of being out on the water, moving through it, generally in control of this element to get from point A to point B.

Today a friend at the Bean (our local coffee shop) asked Bryce and I to come out and see the catamaran that he has been building over the past twelve years. I stood in awe of all the work that went into making this craft from an empty hull. He showed us all the stainless work that he had to fabricate to hold up his mast and sails, as well as cleats to moor the boat, and even a barbeque on the stern. Then there were all the little compartments for clothing, food, and tools as well as all the other little things we have in a house. Yes, this boat is his house in the water.

And just as most folks are proud of their house, so we sailors are proud of our boats.  This fellow proudly showed us his dinghy that he had fabricated out of fiberglass to fit on the stern of his catamaran.  I am in awe of anyone who can make something so complex with so many intricate parts as a sailboat or even a dinghy.  I know that Bryce and I could never make anything like this.  But then again, we do have other talents that are probably awesome to most individuals–we don’t do so well fixing up boats (we pay others to do that for us) but we can help to fix some marriages.  We have another Love Odyssey cruise scheduled for the week of Fourth of July.

Helen  06/26/11

Today we are on day six of our seven day Love Odyssey. At 5:30 this morning we met our couple and took them to a remote beach in the dinghy. Each partner was given the opportunity to vent their resentments for 30 minutes while the other one had to sit quietly and listen. Then we dug a hole and they burned the resentments. Bryce officiated at a resentment ceremony (similar to a wedding ceremony) followed by champagne.  For me this is the most fitting and emotional ending to a journey of love and re-commitment to a relationship.  I always feel very emotional after this and in my mind this is not only a re-commitment for our Odyssey couple, but also a personal commitment for Bryce and I to continue our own journey to help others and to grow ourselves.

Helen– 06/17/11

Yesterday and today have been cleaning days in preparation for our first Love Odyssey of the year. We steam cleaned the carpets, shampooed all the pillows and cushions and even cleaned out the scuppers. We also shopped and provisioned the boat for a week of sailing. Bryce and I are both very excited about the coming trip. We look forward to helping another couple look hard at their relationship and find out ways to re-establish the bond. What you probably don’t know is that when we work with couples, we too, are also strengthening our own bond with each other. So with each couple that we help, Bryce and I learn more about each other and feel even more connection.

Helen   06/04/11

Yesterday we got up at five a.m. so we could get an early start to Ocracoke.  We knew lots of other boaters would want to make Ocracoke their destination and we wanted to be sure to secure a Park Service dock.  In past years we learned that these fill up quickly.  Although we could anchor out in Silver Lake, it is more convenient to tie up to the dock rather than have to jump into the dinghy each time we need to go to shore.  We left at 6:00 and motor sailed with jib and staysail up to give us the best speed.  We are not racers, but Bryce did race and pass several other sail boats on his quest for the “prize”.  At 11:30 we entered the harbor and had several docks from which to choose.  Hurray! We won the race!

I am still in a “boot” after my foot surgery 3 weeks ago, so I am not very helpful at getting the boat docked-or even moving around much on deck with all the lines and hardware—but there were some nice folks standing around the docks and they helped secure lines.  We made it!  The remainder of the day we just enjoyed being here.

- Helen 05/29/2011

Thursday I regained more freedom. Bryce took me back to the orthopedic surgeon for my post-surgery visit. They cut off my plaster cast, took out 42 stitches–ouch!, x-rayed my foot, and put me into a “boot”. Good-bye crutches and walker and hello freedom. The boot makes me shift my weight to my heel so the front part of my foot does not move and the bones can continue to heal. Wow! We celebrated my new-found freedom by going to the grocery store and then out to lunch. It was wonderful!

This weekend we found out that I can still negotiate the ladder on the transom of the boat so I can board our dinghy as usual. That means that for the long Memorial Day weekend we can take the boat out and anchor somewhere. No, I still can’t get my foot wet, but I really don’t miss swimming in the cold water this time of year. It looks like I may get the boot off around Independence Day–it will certainly be a good way to re-assert my independence!

Helen 05/22/11

I’m not a good patient–I hate having someone wait on me and I have no patience with my body when it cannot do what I want. So the first three days after my surgery when I was on total bedrest was very, very hard for me. Monday night my patience was wearing thin and I admit I was pretty bitchy with Bryce. Poor man, he was doing his best fixing supper and waiting on me. But I had my fill of this “bed rest” and wanted to get up and do for myself. So he got the brunt of my discontent.

By Tuesday morning I decided it was time to gradually reclaim my former life as much as possible. I started by hobbling out to the kitchen to fix my own breakfast. Then I loaded the dishwasher –my way–and proceded to wash a couple of loads of laundry. By noon I was tired and my foot was sore and swelling a bit, but I had a smile on my face and Bryce had a hot lunch fixed by me. That evening I decided to tackle the stairs–on my rump–so I could sleep in my own bed and not the guest room downstairs.   And so the week went as I gradually reclaimed my old life. Wednesday night Bryce hinted that I might be well enough to try the boat this weekend. We had originally planned to stay home another week until I got the cast off and a “boot” on. By Thursday morning I was itching to get down here to the coast even though ambulating around this boat and its many steps presented a big challenge. Well, we got here at 3:00 today and the steps were not that difficult to descend–on my rump. So here I am sitting in the pilothouse with this big grin on my face–I did it!

Helen 05/13/11

Last night I came home from the hospital. This was supposed to be an outpatient procedure but my intolerance to the pain meds (severe nausea) caused me to spend a night in hospital. So now I am home and surrounded by walker, crutches, and other invalid care equipment. Bryce is my nurse and Suzy is all over the bed giving me kisses-if only they could heal my foot!

It is really hard for me to relinquish all the household tasks and just sit in bed and be waited on. But I have no choice–so I will just make the best of it. I’ll continue the saga in the coming weeks.

Helen 05/08/11

I am really nervous tonight. Tomorrow morning I am having major surgery on my left foot to remove a bunion, stabilize a broken second toe, and make room for my other toes. I will be in a cast for two weeks and then in a “boot” for another six to eight weeks. So for eight to ten weeks I will not be able to bear any weight on my left foot. I tried out some crutches today and I nearly lost my balance. I have on order a “knee walker” that the doctor thought would be better for getting around the house. Did I say I am scared?! The pain is supposed to be pretty intense–I picked up my pain meds. from the pharmacy yesterday and spoke with the pharmacist–this is heavy-duty stuff.

But you know what is really bothering me? Being helpless and having to rely on Bryce to fix the meals, clean the house, and even help me bathe. I’m such an independent woman that it will be difficult to just sit back and wait for him to do my bidding. I won’t be able to do steps at all except to bump up and down on my bottom–and of course our bedroom is upstairs. Then there is the bit about driving and working–that is also a big question mark. We will have to see how it goes. And of course getting on and off the boat and getting down into the cabin of the boat will also be a challenge. So I am very nervous tonight. I’ll keep you posted….

Helen 05/05/11

This weekend we took the boat to Beaufort. Yesterday we had gusty conditions and Bryce tried to anchor the boat in Taylor’s Creek. Another sailor kept yelling to him to pick up a mooring. We have never used a mooring ball and Bryce did not know how to do this. The other sailor finally rowed his dinghy over and showed him how to pick up the line and tie it to our boat. He explained that there were lots of storms around and when the tide and wind are opposing, different boats can point in different directions, potentially hitting each other. So we took the mooring of someone who is in the islands and paid for it with 3 bottles of beer and three bottles of ginger beer.

Today we took  Suzy to Bird Shoal Island which is across from the Front St. and where wild ponies wander freely. We did not see any ponies but Suzy did get up close and personal with a fiddler crab–and had her nose pinched. I don’t think she will ever get close to anything ressembling this again!

This evening while we were eating dinner in the cockpit a small cruise ship came into port. We have put the photo on for you to see.

Helen 04/23/11

Every Monday night for the past six weeks we have been taking Suzy to Puppy Kindergarten at Petsmart. We have been learning how to train her in basic obedience such as “sit”, “stay” and “come”. This has not been easy for Suzy or me. She seems to have the attention span of a fly and barks anytime she hears another dog or an unusual noise. We practiced our “homework” every day. Some days were better than others. She learned “sit” and “spin” very quickly, but “down” (lying completely flat on the floor) was impossible for her to learn. I tried all kinds of treats, but it always seemed she was a born see-saw; if the head was down on the mat, the rear was up and vice versa. A week ago one of the more experienced trainers was finally able to get her completely down, but it took quite a bit of patience and many tasty treats. Of course when I tried the same techniques at home, Suzy just reverted back to her see-saw. Last night was “graduation” and I really thought Suzy would flunk the final test and be asked to repeat “kindergarten”. But our trainer was able to get Suzy down flat and I was able to duplicate the result several times last night–success!! Yes, we made it! And my little miss graduated!!

Now we are going to try graduate puppy training. We have signed up for another six weeks. I have confidence Suzy can learn if the treat is tasty enough! My hope is to get her eventually certified as a Therapy Dog since she goes to work with me every day and interacts with the little people who come into my speech therapy practice.

Helen 04/19/11